Tuesday, 10 May 2016

'I Am Very THANKFUL To Have Had The Option To Terminate My Pregnancy'

...TGNB Abortion Series 9! 

Statistic shows that more than 70% of women who have had an abortion felt good afterwards. . .and for the first time on TGNB abortion series, we have a young woman who says she has no regret whatsoever about her abortion...but guess what she said afterwards???

I am in my early 20’s and found out I was pregnant just a few months ago. I can still remember the moment so vividly. The moment I read ‘2-3 weeks pregnant’, my heart sank and I began to shake. My immediate thoughts were dark and I could not see a positive way out of the situation and turmoil which had beset my life. I am a college student with a definite career plan and my studies are going well and I feel I am well on the way to fulfilling my childhood dream of becoming a teacher. From a very young age, I have dreamed of becoming a mother and I still do, however now is not the time for more reasons than just the inconvenience of it. The relationship which has led me here today is far from ideal and in fact on reflection since hearing my news I have come to realise that it was unhealthy and stood very little chance of a long term future. My boyfriend (at the time) initial reaction was delight, mine was shock and confusion and needed the support which he did not give me. Our views on the situation quickly grew us apart.

My initial thoughts did not include termination as it was not a subject I had ever had to consciously consider. Myself and my mother talked about termination and it became a viable option and I was able to debate the subject in the light of my current situation. It was not an easy decision but I knew it was the right thing to do. For me to bring a baby into this world at this time would not be right for me, the father, our families and more importantly, the child. I have always wanted to be a mother and still do with all of my heart.

A week later I travelled to England with my mum. It was a very long, stressful and emotionally draining day. To say that was tough is an understatement. I wasn’t able to tell my friends anything. I had to stay strong and act like everything was okay. I had to hold back the tears during lectures, work and while talking to friends. I am a very open and honest person and therefore, keeping this secret from all but my family has been intensely emotional as I had to be economical with the truth and disguise my emotions pretending that my fragile and tearful feelings were due to the ending of my relationship and not the impending termination of my pregnancy.

It is hard to shift the ‘what if’’ ideas from my mind. Even though it is something that constantly runs through my mind I do not regret my decision. I am so glad to have had the support from my family I did and very thankful to have had the option to terminate my pregnancy. I can remember when finding out I was pregnant thinking 'my life is over’ and then after making my decision to terminate my pregnancy thinking 'I will never be the same’. But I am glad to say my life was not over and I am doing much better than I had originally expected.

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